Virtue!?
Nishanth: Hi! I’ve wanted to ask you this question for quite some time; what are your values?
Niharika (raising her eyebrows): What are my values?
Nishanth: Yes – your values! What are they?
Niharika: Well ok I value virtue.
Nishanth (looking puzzled): You value virtue!?!
Niharika: Yes. Haven’t you heard the phrase,’ he/she is a virtuous person’?
Nishanth: Hmm not really, not anymore I suppose. I’ve heard people talk about values; ‘he/she values truth’. Anyways, what’s the difference? Who talks of virtue these days? And aren’t they the same?
Niharika (enthusiastically): Well nowadays people have replaced virtue with value. Truth is a virtue but has become a value. I might value truth in office but not at home. But virtue says truth should matter everywhere. Value is relative to the circumstance but virtue will remain true in all circumstances. Value will say I value chastity at home but not with my friends. But virtue says, “Chastity – everywhere boss”. Sometimes the good stops us from getting to the better; likewise value is good but virtue is better. Value is small and virtue is big. Value is smaller than me but virtue is bigger and larger than me. Virtue is broad and zeroes in on all aspects of our life. Value is narrow and may even broaden your insanity!
Nishanth (reluctantly): Oh ok… so what….hmmm I still don’t get it? What if someone says, ‘yes, love is a virtue everywhere, and that’s why I love both my wife and my neighbour’s wife at the same time and in the same way’?
Niharika: Well, I’m glad you brought that up! Galatians Ch 5: 22-23 says, “But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Here there is no conflict with the law.” Well you see the virtue ‘love’ cannot exist independently. So someone can’t love both his wife and his neighbour’s wife; because he is being unfaithful and lacks self-control and true love. That is why it says fruit and not fruits; All for one; One for all! If you fail in one you have failed in all. Everything has to be held together in a precariously beautiful way.
Nishanth (scratching his head): Hmm … now I seem to be getting it. But how does this work?
Niharika: In one of Billy Graham’s crusade, two men sitting next to each other accepted Christ. One was a petty thief. And when the two were walking down to the main arena, responding to the call, for prayer; the thief said to other gentleman, ‘I have to make a confession- while we were sitting in the bleachers I stole your purse, so here it is’. This is what the Holy Spirit does; there is a sense of immediate repentance, like in the life of Zacchaeus (Luke 19:7-10). When the Holy Spirit enters, it reorganises everything in our life; like a wave that reorganises everything on the shore.
Nishanth (surprised): Really … just one wave… but then how come … you know… hmmm… all those Christians… was it the wrong wave?
Niharika: he he … For some it takes a single wave while for others, I suppose, it takes a couple of little waves. But no matter what, his wave of grace will constantly crash into the shores of our life- probably those Christians have forgotten that we are all, forever, in need of His True, Good and Beautiful Grace! Finally brother, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.
-Bobby Thejus
This That and the Other – Part 4
Together, Ananya and Aditya asked “Who – hate them both! Why?”
“I mean, totally broad minded pessimists and narrow minded optimists.” Humphry answered,
“Why? I thought that the broad- minded ones were ‘cool’.” Ananya innocently interrogated.
“A solely broad minded man is a liar. He claims to be broadminded but by no means will he accommodate narrow-minded people. He is a schmuck; his mind is so broad and open that it can’t hold anything of common good in it. He is dangerous; he can never have an opinion on anything, everything is fine with him. His motto is ‘these are my values if you don’t like them I have others too.’“
He continued. “They are shameless; his common sense is no longer common- his senses have become frightfully moribund. He will think through his heart and feel with his mind. He will not be able to tell the difference between: Mahatma Gandhi and Pres. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Martin Luther King Jr. and Osama, Mother Theresa and Lady Diana, Fact and fiction, Leonardo da Vinci and The Da Vinci Code, Truth and lie, Love (Eros) and lust, Marriage and living-in, Beautiful and perverted, Sane and insane, Clothed and naked, Salt and sugar, Oranges and apples, Rotten apples and ripe apples, Addition and subtraction, Sword and knife, to kill and to be murdered, Straight and twisted. He will make every attempt to silence his conscience (ought-ness). Cancer is artistic so long as it’s not him who has it. He is a thoroughbred pessimist and for all practical purposes of no use absolutely. He is an optimist who will play Bach for a deaf man.”
“Ok ok, now that was an interesting take on, wait, pessimistic… broadminded… optimistic… charlatans. But what about narrow minded ones? Are you trying to suggest to us that they are right?” Asked Ananya, while Aditya was mulling over what had been said.
“My gosh- no way, I’m sure you know those thickheads are no better! It would be easier for a monkey to become a man, than to make him understand that it is rather man making a monkey of himself. He will hand you a rose with one hand and with the other chop your nose off. He will always speak the truth, but never truthfully.” Speaking straight from the shoulder Humphry continued, “You see… He will never realize that Truth and Grace are the two sides of the same coin; he is so narrow that the coin cannot get through (to him). He is so optimistic about his pessimism that he will not play Beethoven to a deaf man.”
Honestly, both of them don’t believe in freedom. “What you ought and need to do is to renew your mind.’ Be made new by the renewal of your mind.’” Humphry responded and went on to simplify it in terms of relationships.
“The broad minded one is only ‘there’ for you not quite ‘here’ for you. While the narrow minded one is only ‘here’ and not quite ‘there’ for you. But you need to be here and there. And then there is only One who is here there and everywhere, He has found you but have you found him?”
-Bobby Thejus
This That and the Other – Part 3
Ananya wakes up refreshed and glad about herself, it’s the morning of 1st Jan 2525. She
decides to continue her morning walks with her good ole’ pal Aditya on the banks of the river Somewhere. It had been a while since she had felt the cool breeze crash into her. A hello and a warm hug were exchanged. And then, after a while, she saw something unusual. Something she couldn’t explain. Excited she stopped her existential prattle and attempted to explain this odd phenomenon to Aditya. Another hustle was heard and this time Aditya who was busy chattering away, trying to cavil over her yesterday, heard it to. “What was that?” he screamed. “I thought I saw something strange too”, she said.
And then they saw the strange stranger. This time they got to have a good look at him. They had seen people experiment with their bodies in the holy name of exercise; but what they were about to witness was unhackneyed… state-of-the-art… converted; it seemed as though he was walking around upside down. So they went up to him hoping to make conversation. Not knowing where to look, here or there, they bent a little, attempting to make eye contact, they asked for his name. To which he very politely responded, ‘Humphry Dumphry’.
“So where are you from, Mr. Humphry Dumphry?” they inquired.
“I’m from Herethereandeverywhere“.
“And where is this?”
“It’s to the other end of this end and to the far end of that end, to the south of the North Pole and to the north of the South Pole.”
“Is that somewhere close to Timbuktu?”
“Hmm…well, if that helps, yes I could be from there too.”
Aditya as usual sarcastically asked, “so what ‘cha looking for down there, here?”
To which Humphry candidly (bluntly) responded, “I’ve found what I’m looking for. And that’s the reason, or so it seems, I walk around upside down so at least then I can see the world right side up. And I’m sure you still haven’t found what you really ought to look for, or maybe you don’t even realize you need to- with your head up there, high and dry.
“I know… we are so full of ourselves with empty bloated heads and hideous brassy hearts”, said Ananya, “everything seems so screwed up, so trivial.”
“Don’t you have friends?” asked Humphry.
“Oh yes I have many. I’m a part of ‘Hi! Friends Group’ and right now I have 101 friends online. If you want, you can sign up and become my 102 nd friend, and alllll… my 101 friends will be yours!!”
“Wow! Thanks for the offer. Friendship by and large has been a great source of happiness for me too. But petty acquaintances mean little to me. I will prefer to make real friends than to just know more people. I love to meet new and different people but I wouldn’t, for the birds, classify them all as friends.”
“Please explain,” asked Ananya
“So what do you think about narrow-minded people? Ananya and I think they are pricks”, butting in and throwing opinionated questions wasn’t unusual to Aditya’s nature.
“I hate them both,” said Humphry.
-Bobby Thejus
This That and the Other – Part 2
…And then something unusual to her nature propped up, and she began to philosophize! “What is need?” She had now asked the great Socratic question. “Hmm… need…. Need to be loved, need to be accepted, the need to be freed from this pain, but then all needs can’t be justified. And isn’t there a time and a rightful place where these needs can be justified meaningfully and met with dignity. Just because I have the ability to fill the need in mine and in another’s life, can I go about giving away, at the expense of straining every other relationship and silencing my conscience?”
At that point she had moved one step ahead and above philosophy; from knowledge she had been knighted with wisdom. “Ah! I should share this brilliance with Aditya during our morning walks. He doesn’t bother to call. I bet he has forgotten that it’s my birthday today but then he has been a good friend or whatever, these past 10yrs or so…and I think I’ve heard some of that brilliance in some form, a friend maybe or my parents who bore and cheese me off with their gyan.”
Ananya had always felt her parents never understood her, its true though in some sense, but isn’t it true also that sometimes we don’t understand ourselves. Haven’t we become strangers to ourselves? We are so easily bored of this that and the other. Bored of the reasons of why we do the things we do, ‘ho hum, – same-old-thing attitude’. So we tend to seek the new with a fatal bent.
Now, confused she raised a very poignant question. “Shouldn’t there be something bigger and greater that can satisfy this longing in me; some source from which I can drink and thirst no more? Why is it that I feel this odd sense of guilt and shame? Well meaning people have told me to get rid of it, but with what? The things I indulge in, in order to get rid of this make me feel even sicker. The very thing that spurs me to action is that which is hurt the most-my emotions! Loneliness and boredom seem to haunt me, I wonder if anyone really loves me. I wish that magical land Narnia were real. In there just one look at Aslan’s furry mane would have cleared this foggy gnawing feeling. All this suffering should make sense; I know there could emerge from all of this some beauty but it’s so hard to see.”
She remembered a scene she had read about in Humphry’s world; Humphry walked, around, upside down so that at least then he could see the world right side up. “Though this be madness”, she thought, “there is method in it.”
Aren’t we all craving for relationships but yet, sometimes, it hardly lasts; I wonder why? No doubt some last, and those that last give us hope and strength. She had noticed that relationships don’t even last as long as politicians last in word and in deed, but then she couldn’t belittle lovely relationships either.
So she asked herself. “What about the love shared among friends and family; times when I am down and low, happy and excited I know for sure some friend/family from yester years who knew me better then than any one now, is still there to; lean on and cry or celebrate. What peace it brings to know that there are friends and family who care, who really care.”
She had good friends, friends who loved her as much as she loved them. She thought of the many times she had helped them and she wished that even if they couldn’t help they would at least care to point to some-Other who could.
She yawned-0; she had exerted that tiny brain of hers for too long. She had thought thoughts much beyond anyone her age would. Those tireless hands had ticked their way up to 5:45am and still staring at her beautiful reflection, but now with wonder she acknowledged the beauty that lay both within and without. Yes, not caring less or more about this that and the other, she turned off the lights cringed back in her corner, pulled the blankets over, and said to herself, “I’m not going to give up or give in, so help me God!” with that thought lingering she fell asleep feeling a strange sense of peace which overwhelmed her with unspeakable joy, in spite of that intense pain.
Bobby Thejus.
This That and the Other – Part 1
She wakes up frightened and startled, its 3am, walks up to her dressing table turns on the light, stares at her beautiful reflection and wonders why she’s been created; confused and ugly. “If only I had this that and the other, like those other people in beauty magazines, maybe then he and they might pay more attention, like they do, to those who have this that and the other.” She further wondered whether she could call what she had with him as love. He was too demanding so demanding that he wanted “that” from her, as a confirmation (a cremation rather) or a commemoration of their; these many weeks, months or years of dating or hanging around together.
“I don’t think its right, darling.” Ananya said
“Well, what’s wrong, don’t you love me.” He said
“Yes, I do!”
“Well, then why can’t we”
“I don’t know… I think there is an ordained time for this …, because I believe; Love knows when to say No! If you love me you can wait too.”
“But then aren’t we animals and animals don’t wait”
“But then don’t you see Damien, I’m not an animal, and if I were one I would have bitten that tail and plucked that eye of yours the last time I saw you ogling. Actually I wouldn’t have really cared if I were an animal; I would have simply made the most of my animal rights instinct and bit that empty head of yours. Well, even if you were to say it’s an appetite like any other appetite; wouldn’t it be really odd if one our appetites were to become our only preoccupation.”
The lines were beginning to fade, she thought, “Love and lust now mean the same thing” reminiscing about what had been taught many years back, a kid then it meant something different, but now it meant more: “isn’t love patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love doesn’t demand its own way, it’s not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it’s been wronged. It’s never glad about injustice but rejoices when the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. Isn’t lust selfish the opposite of or a crooked imitation of true love?”
Ananya had come across a quack who said that: ‘we were a very liberal society, way ahead of our time. Chandragupta Maurya actually had naked female bodyguards. This is the land of Kamasutra.’- I wonder how it would feel if this quack would have his relative as one of those vulnerable women embellishing that elaborately dressed king’s palace. Even tribal cultures have had some idea of right and wrong, gift and punishment.
Neways, slowly her thoughts began to drift on those same lines and suddenly a random thought appeared, “Talking about freedom, man, today media seems to be dictating terms; even our ideas on friendship and family are shaped by some movie or serial. Now they have begun to curb on our freedom to laugh, by giving us a cue with a bunch of muffs laughing in the background, to inform us its time to laugh. No doubt it’s funny, hilarious and all, but then shouldn’t we have the freedom to know when to and when not to laugh.”
Staring at her reflection she thought, “what if I tell them”, her friends i.e., “man, they would freak out, cause sometimes I’ve noticed our world, the way we dress, behave and relate to each other, revolves around that box, sometimes it’s nice and exciting but most times its really frustrating. I remember speaking to Krithi though she has this that and the other yet, she mentioned that, she too feels empty, miserable, vulnerable, and living in denial. I guess we are expecting to find the right answers, in the wrong places, from the wrong people; we are people in need.”
- Bobby Thejus
